If holiday shopping makes you break out in a cold sweat, Amy’s “Rule of Five” might be the tiny miracle you need. It’s an easy way to prioritize gifts so kids get a balanced mix of fun, useful, and meaningful presents, without you losing your mind.
The Rule of Five says each child gets five gifts that fall into these categories:
- Something they want — the fun, exciting item on their wishlist.
- Something they need — practical stuff (school supplies, socks, winter gear).
- Something to wear — clothes or shoes that are useful and presentable.
- Something to read — a book or magazine to encourage reading (yes, even if kids don’t react like it’s the best present ever).
- Something to do — an activity or experience (board game, art kit, tickets, or a membership).
Think of it as a shopping cheat sheet that keeps purchases intentional and helps you avoid a pile of random, impulse toys. You don’t have to announce this system to your kids. Use it as a parent-only guideline to balance purchases. When browsing, ask yourself: which of the five categories does this fill? If you’re stressed about choices, let the rule narrow the list.
A few practical ways to implement it: Line gifts up on the floor and decide which to open first (fun for the kids, no chaos for you), let kids pick which category they want opened first (gives them control while keeping the total number reasonable), and If you have picky kids, let them choose which type of “something to do” they want like crafts, sports gear, experiences, so it feels personalized.
If you have multiple kids, keeping the number of gifts equal helps avoid holiday arguments. That doesn’t mean every present must cost the same, some gifts can be bigger or smaller, but aim for a visual sense of balance so nobody feels left out. If one child gets three bigger items and another gets seven small ones, the numbers can feel unfair even if the value is similar. Kids will always want more “wants.” That’s normal. The Rule of Five gives you a framework to respond with: “You can pick one big ‘want’ and we’ll cover needs, wear, read, and do.” It sets boundaries while still letting them have fun.
In the Bobby Bones Show studio, someone joked “What if they need a spanking?” We’ll file that under comedy and offer a calmer suggestion instead: if behavior is the issue, treat discipline separately from gifts. Use age-appropriate consequences, conversations about gratitude, or reward systems that teach responsibility without mixing holidays and punishment.
The Rule of Five isn’t about being stingy. It’s about thoughtful gifting that covers joy, growth, and usefulness, not just more stuff. And if your kid opens a pair of socks and makes a grumpy face on Christmas morning, remember: this system can still help you survive the holidays with your sanity intact.